The Last Day Of Vicki Donovan
by Sakurane
Summary: The last moments of Vicki Donovan's life before she it turned into a vampire. Vicki's POV.
1. The Last Day Of Vicki Donovan Part One

The Last Day Of Vicki Donovan: "Is it better to go out with a bang, in a flaming moment of glory?"

**I do not own TVD, or Vicki Donovan. If I did, then she'd probably still be whining in the show right now. Sorry about the swearing.**

March 20th, the day of my death.

I don't know what I've done to deserve all the shit that has happened in my life. Or maybe it was because I can't do anything right. I'm nothing like my brother. Matt is so goddamned perfect. He is inherently good, almost to the point of being a complete bore. I honestly have no idea how he keeps it up, when our lives have gone to the dogs. I can't cope, so I get by bumming drugs from the only person who cares about me besides Matt, and selling my body to Tyler fucking Lockwood in return for a bit of love.

Self-worth is overrated, I guess. And I figured that I'd might as well go with the flow and surrender myself to the hell that seems to have taken over my teenager life. That was what I told myself for most of my adolescent years.

I'd gotten so tired of people _judging _me, and acting like they know me. The worst was the pity in their eyes. Even Matt, my own brother, had stopped believing in me. He just sighed and shook his head, as if to say, "well, what can I do. Vicki will be Vicki". As if he expected me to stumble home in a drunk stupor on week nights and pass out on the porch when I can't find the house key.

Well, if my family's expectations were so low, I decided that I'd just keep on lowering them. I wanted to figure out where the bottom line was, and when they would give up on me. When would I hit rock bottom?

The only person who seems _disappointed _in me was Jeremy Gilbert, the little emo-underclassman who started following me around after I bought drugs from him for the first time. I used to just ignore him, but I eventually started thinking it was pretty cute. He couldn't judge me because he was almost as fucked up as I am, but he cared about me. He didn't let my bad behavior slide if it was too self-destructive. He acted like I was his whole world or something, and I have no idea why. But you never can tell with boys.

He wouldn't want me hurting myself like this. He wouldn't want me teetering on the edge, I think as I stared into the fire. My vision swam, and I felt lighter than air. I would have floated away if I hadn't been stuck in my ugly, unlovable body. I suddenly wished that Tyler were there, to touch me and make me feel pretty again. He used to whisper nice things to me when we were naked, but the rest of the time we had to pretend that we didn't know each other. And then I wished that Jeremy were here instead, to hold my hand and tell me off for snorting another line of coke. I wondered I could convince Jeremy to come with me next time… but his sister kept him on a tighter leash than Matt did on me.

Someone was howling beside me, a free and unworried sound. Another girl was murmuring to the air, but none of us were listening. The fire in the middle of us seemed to flare angrily and dance before my eyes.

When a figure stepped out from the trees, I thought that I was hallucinating again. I was way high at that point, and our group was so far out in the middle of no-where that it made no sense for anyone else to be there that late at night.

It was four o'clock in the morning, what the fuck was he doing here? That was the only rational thought that came to me. That, and that the man was gorgeous. He smirked cruelly, and gazed over all of us.

"This is quite the party… but I think you kiddies are out a little late."

I tried to ask him if he wanted to join us, but I think it came out jumbled and slurred.

"Nobody will miss you, will they… I wonder if anybody will even notice if you never come home again."

Matt would, I thought. But doubt made me realize that I wasn't even sure anymore.

"I'm _extremely _angry with my brother right now, and I need to let out some steam. Sorry, but you're unlucky enough to meet me on a bad day."


	2. The Last Day Of Vicki Donovan Part Two

The Last Day Of Vicki Donovan: "Sure, I may have died. But at least I'd felt truly alive during the last few minutes."

**I do not own characters of The Vampire Diaries.**

**So, I was honestly just really inspired by the episode "The Lost Girls". As much as I found Vicki to be incredibly whiny and annoying, she was also tragic and fun loving. She was just a lost little girl, whom fate treated pretty horribly. I mean, she had so much of her life still ahead of her. In a way, I found her to be one of the more relatable VD characters. But somehow, I didn't find her death/transition to be completely horrible. Anyway, I just wanted to write a little bit about her last days as a human. Sorry it's a little choppy, because I wrote it during school. Warning, there is minor talk of drug usage.**

I never expected to do anything special in my life. The closest thing to excitement that I ever felt in the small little town of Mystic Falls was messing around in the back seat of Tyler's car, ashamed but loving the thrill that I got over the fact that there was a chance we would be discovered. I used to think it would be funny if his mom found us, because she would probably have a heart-attack—and if she survived the initial shock, Tyler would have been _forced _to tell her the truth about our relationship. Then we wouldn't have to hide.

But even that thrill wore off, like they all do. Then you're just left craving more. Even drugs weren't doing it for me anymore. A needle in my arm just wasn't enough, because that was the problem with highs: you always had to come down to really low lows.

That school year was the worst. It was like I was walking around stoned 24/7, my senses permanently dull. I was always in a daze. Everything was just _pointless _and boring.

That was why I didn't fight the way that I should have that night. Something so out of the ordinary was happening to me, that I didn't even know how to deal with it.

He'd grabbed my arm, and his black-blue eyes (even now, I can't completely remember which color they were) had ben emotionless. They were completely devoid of feeling, and that was what had truly terrified me the most.

My one lucid thought had been, "Wow, he's really going to _kill_ me!"

His mouth on my neck was just so bizarre and unreal. I suddenly couldn't breathe, and my head was heavy on his shoulder. The man had taken such a huge first gulp of my blood that he'd sapped all of my strength instantly. I felt my body go limp, and I heard another sickening, wet sound of flesh being chomped on. Not that I'd ever heard something like that before, but somehow I _knew _what was happening to me could only be described as chomping. The pressure built, then released in the same moment.

I didn't feel attached to my body anymore. He was standing over it, a glum, almost petulant- yes, I know that word- look on his face. But he didn't seem sorry at all.

Then I blacked out.


End file.
